Lady GaGa

Although this is not a text, it was a pretty awesome conversation (Remember our Mother's Day breakfast?). I recently went to a concert and my mom called me the next day to ask me how it was:

Mom: "How was the concert?"

Me: "It was really good. I had fun"

Mom: "That's good. Who was it?"

Me: "Lady GaGa"

Mom: "WHO?! Lady Faha?"

Me: "Lady GaGa. She sings dancey-pop music. You don't know her"

Mom: "Who knows who this is? Lady Faha. Who has a name like that?"

Me: "It's Lady GaGa. With a G"

Mom: "I thought you were seeing Gwen!"

My mother is actually on a first-name basis with Gwen Stefani from No Doubt. They go way back...

Me: "No, No Doubt isn't touring. I saw them over the summer"

Mom: "Oh, I thought you were seeing them. You only see them"

Me: "I see other people too..."

I now know that the next concert I go to, I will say it was No Doubt regardless of who was playing. It's easier to explain...

Finally!

I know, I know...it's been ages since my last post! Not that I haven't had the material, there will always be lots to talk about. Since my last post, there has been many great text messages from my mom. So I will start with a few good ones:

My mom will sometimes ask me for directions which always ends up in a disaster because you think she's actually listening to you when you're explaining things, but I assure you...she's not. This makes it difficult when telling her where to go because she'll say "ok thanks" and then she guesses where to go and ends up about 20 miles away from where she's supposed to be. A great example is when I gave her directions to meet me somewhere, I didn't have enough time to explain it so I sent her an e-mail. Little did I know...that wasn't a good idea because this conversation took place about 3 days after that e-mail was sent:

Mom: "jen what mind merge?"
Me: "What?"
Mom: "merge what is?"

Not knowing she was talking about the directions, I respond with "to merge? it's combining 2 things together"
Mom: "Ok tks"

Now..you would think that this obviously made no sense to her since "combining 2 things together" wouldn't exactly be helpful when you're lost. I just figured she wanted to know what a random word meant. So about 5 minutes later, I realize she may be talking about the directions.

Me: "Wait, r u talking about the directions? That means to get on the highway"
Mom: "Yes"

As many of you have read in the past, my mom has often misspelled words and the texts need to be deciphered. However, I started receiving texts that have actual words that are spelled correctly but don't really make sense in her sentence. This usually causes more confusion than misspelled or made-up words.

Mom: "i feel like piece of cheat"
Me: "what's a piece of cheat?"
Mom: "i dont feel good!"

I assume she was trying to use another expression that may be obvious looking at the full conversation and maybe "piece of cheat" is a new sensored way of saying it?? I should start using that, maybe we'll start a trend.

My mom isn't that great with common expressions, which is common for people from other countries...but that doesn't make it any less amusing.

Mom: "jen someone want to translate this this is my story and i am sticking to it. what is sticking?"

I explained that the expression meant that the person wasn't going to change their story. I was then told that she thinks that expression is stupid...or in her words..a "piece of cheat" expression!